And for the first time in a long while, Jonathan felt truly at peace.
He sat back against the worn leather of the couch, his mind replaying the moments from earlier that day. The laughter, the joy, the children’s excitement—it was all so real, so natural. There were no pretenses, no walls to hide behind, just a simple connection between people who had been through pain but found comfort in each other’s presence. And Courtney… Courtney had fit into their world in a way he hadn’t imagined possible.
He smiled to himself, thinking about how her face had lit up when she saw the decorations, the kids’ excitement when she walked in. She had seemed so genuine, so full of life, and yet, Jonathan knew the kind of loneliness she had been living with for years. How many people had really seen her since the accident? How many had truly understood her world? How many had tried to bridge that gap, to make her feel normal again? Probably none. And here she was, sitting at the head of the table with his children, laughing, playing, not as a stranger, but as part of their family.
A soft sound at the doorway pulled him from his thoughts. He turned to see Margaret standing there, her arms crossed, watching him with an expression that seemed both knowing and kind.
“You’re thinking about her again,” Margaret said quietly.
Jonathan blinked, surprised by the accuracy of her observation. He nodded slowly, running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, I guess I am.”
Margaret’s smile was warm but tinged with a quiet sadness. “I’ve never seen you like this, Jon. Not since—well, not since Amy left.”
Jonathan’s eyes flickered. He didn’t need to be reminded of the way his world had crumbled when Amy chose her career over their family. He had tried to make it work, to be the best father he could be to the quadruplets, but every day had been a battle. To keep up with work, to keep the house running, to balance the endless demands of four energetic, demanding kids. There had been no room left for him. For his needs. For love. For anything outside of survival.
But now, sitting here with Margaret, the weight of that loneliness felt a little less heavy. “It’s… different this time,” Jonathan said, his voice softer than he’d intended.
Margaret stepped into the room and sat down beside him. Her presence was comforting, a steadying force. She had been with him through the chaos of his life, always there when things fell apart, never once backing away. Jonathan knew she wasn’t just a nanny—she was a part of the family.
“I can see that,” she replied. “I’ve watched you, Jon. I’ve seen how you’ve closed yourself off after Amy left. How you’ve kept everything so tight, so controlled. But with Courtney, it’s different. You’re not just letting her in, you’re letting yourself be seen too. And that’s… that’s something you haven’t done in a long time.”
Jonathan didn’t respond at first, his mind processing her words. Was it really different this time? He had been so afraid of opening up, so afraid of getting hurt again. But with Courtney, it felt… different. She wasn’t asking for anything from him. She wasn’t demanding. She was just there. Present. And somehow, that was enough.
“I think I’m scared,” Jonathan confessed, his voice low, almost a whisper. “I don’t want to get my hopes up. I don’t want to put the kids through another… another disappointment.”
Margaret’s gaze softened. She placed a hand on his arm. “The kids are already attached to her, Jon. They see her the way they see you. She’s part of their world now, whether you want to admit it or not.”
Jonathan exhaled a deep breath, rubbing his hand across his face. It was true. The children had taken to her almost instantly. Aurelia had already begun drawing pictures of her and Courtney together. Leora had been asking questions about her, about what she liked to do, what her favorite color was. Orion had been making her laugh, always quick with a joke, and Atlas—Atlas had connected with her in a way that left Jonathan speechless. Atlas, who rarely reached out to anyone, had found something in Courtney. He could see it in the way Atlas’s eyes lit up when she signed to him, the way his hands moved with excitement when they communicated. It was the first time in a long time Jonathan had seen his son so animated, so eager to share his world with someone.
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” Jonathan said, almost to himself.
Margaret gave him a small, understanding smile. “Nobody does. But you’re doing it, Jon. You’re opening up. And that’s the first step. Don’t overthink it. Let it happen.”
Jonathan nodded slowly, the weight of her words sinking in. The truth was, he had spent so much time building walls around himself that he hadn’t allowed anything—anyone—close. He had kept his world small, his heart closed off, convinced that it was easier that way. But now… now he wasn’t so sure anymore.
The next few days passed in a whirlwind of activity. Jonathan spent time with the kids, helping them with school projects, getting ready for the party they were planning for Courtney. Each day, his interactions with her became more natural. They exchanged texts, messages in sign language, little notes here and there. It felt easy. Too easy. Courtney had a way of making him forget his past, his fears. She didn’t need him to be anything other than who he was, and that was a kind of freedom Jonathan hadn’t known in years.
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